423高考英语作文中可以用哪些特别地道的句子句式或单词而得到格外加分?

2021年10月16日

19 年全国一卷 145,12 月四级 684。

实名反对万年不变的套模板回答。阅卷老师眼睛毒的亚批,如此流水线式的作文,基本 20/25 分封顶。

要知道得分技巧,就必须了解高考阅卷机制,并投其所好。从前我也以为这些信息对考生没有用,直到大考吃了哑巴亏。

生意嘛,不寒碜。

所以,下面这些方块字不是废话。如果直接下翻找英文去摘抄,反而是舍本逐末。

另外,文末赠送一篇原创作文作品。

开始。

以山东为例,高考阅卷老师是一线骨干老教师、山大山师大研究生组成的队伍。前者经验丰富见多识广,后者自身英语专业能力 6 的飞起——总之,他们居高临下,看猴一般地看我们用 100-120 词抓耳挠腮地表演,这就注定你很难用作文「打动」他们,让他们判出高分。与他们的斗争,大头在第一段及第二段前半部分(圈重点)。阅卷老师这部分看过,基本上考生有多少干货,已经拿捏有数了。剩下的工作,只是在上下浮动三分的区间再做定夺(如考生书写、字数等方面)。所以我们英语老师一直强调,这部分任何情况下都不允许给阅卷人任何扣分的把柄,同时还要最大限度地骑脸秀他一把,赚足印象分。

你要是头够铁,敢把那些所谓「经典金句」拼装上路,遇到我们老师这种心狠手辣(?)的,不出意外 5 秒之内 16 分送走不谢下一位。要是字迹再放肆些,让他感到有被冒犯到,当场就会被按到 135 以下。

放心,不要怕,他不是最狠的。

什么?你说这是高考,怎么会如此草率?dbq, 阅卷老师确实想体谅你,但没人体谅在炎炎夏日封闭机房高强度高压力工作的他们。打分误差太大会被谈话,批的太慢会被谈话,想趁旁人不注意拍一篇满分作文带回去给学生,被抓到的话还是会被谈话。被谈话会拖慢进度,不能准时完工又要被谈话……只要不是哈批,都不会选择这种套娃操作。

6 月的他们,不过也是孙子。他们想要的,不过是赶紧完事拿钱走人,离开这个鬼地方去享受暑假

一开始时由于圣母心和不熟练,阅卷速度还会些许放慢,但不会超过 20 秒。批阅几百份上千份后,他已经对这篇作文命题下考生的发挥方向有了完整的掌控,速度也会大幅度提升(7-8 秒一篇。就这么可怕)。坐在那块亮眼的屏幕前连续五六天后,按我们老师的形容,「整个人处于一种癫狂状态」,给分甚至是「凭借一种模糊感觉」。

在这种情况下,你还想投机取巧套模板?让你看几百遍 It's universally acknowledged that……你想不想吐?反正爷吐了

陈年模板确实不可取,但许多得分点是可抓。在这些地方出彩,让阅卷者感到 impressed,他就会罕见地放慢速度,然后用一种欣赏的眼光和你产生共鸣,发现更多亮点——后面别让他失望,那恭喜你,你赢了。22 分以上带回家。

高考作文的采分主要分为以下几个要素:题目,格式,书写,语法,篇幅,语体(前面是基础,往后是重头戏),句式,词汇,饱满度,层次与流利度,修辞——按对考生水平要求由低到高顺序——另外还有一点,阅卷人感受。

下面展开详谈。一切以全国卷老高考为例,全面解构高考作文(不限于句词)。新高考本质不变。

一、题目

如果有要求,千万不要忘记写题目。这点极大地牵涉到留给阅卷老师地第一印象,虽然不是什么大事,但如果翻车,就不是小事了。

题目第一行居中,简短有力,不要废话——题目不是正文,破题就完事了。

第一个词和最后一个词首字母要大写。在此基础上,一般实词首字母大写(动词、名词、形容词、副词、代词),虚词首字母小写(连词、介词、冠词)但长度超过 5 个字母的介词要大写,如 beneath, between, regarding 等。

但一个现实问题是,阅卷老师有一定可能不完全知道这些规则。他还以为你在量子大小写。

咱是要饭的,得跪着。那么题目就别那么复杂,首尾都用实词,虚词别那么多幺蛾子。「An Adventure of Mine", 横竖挑不出毛病。

同时,题目必须完全契合内容。内容是学生会通知,就不要企图玩火操作。一个"Notice"就说明白了。

如果还要追求完美,题目可以化用一些英文世界的名言或成语,如果阅卷人看的出来那就赚爆,形成了玩梗者之间的默契。即使看不出来,经典的语言看起来也会很简洁有力,一样增加了印象分。比如命题是倡导环保(桑伯格狂喜),那题目就可以是 Let's Heal the World。相信不会有英语从业者没听过 MJ。注意!!!!这一条仅建议稳 140+的考生使用,如果操作不慎极易翻车。

二、格式

格式和题目一样,都是最基本的要素。同理,没有太大操作空间,注意不出错就好。

1.书信:最常见的作文体裁。开头 Dear,结尾 yours,不再赘述。

注意写给谁——别笑,血的教训。题目中给出 Peter 或 editor 还好处理,但收信人身份姓名均不明确时,一定要谨慎。最常见的是 Dear sir or madam,严防死守,毫无破绽(不要假定性别!中国不讲政治正确,但英语文化讲!这不是玩笑!)。Attention!我们小班高二第一次月考时 2/3 的同学因为不会写 madam 吃过亏,这种错误是致命的。如果放在高考,自求多福吧。

Dear 套完近乎再如何操作才能抓人眼球?后面得体和句式板块会有例子详谈。

书信体最后一段一定要简短有力,收束全文(事实上大多数文章都应该如此)。最后秀一把,让打分者再奶一口。这点我也会在后面得体和句式板块再谈到,这里不多说。

yours 后面我习惯加 faithfully,反正不放过一切上分机会。

最后署上事儿精 Li Hua。

2.演讲稿

常见开头:ladies and gents, may I have your attention please?

我喜欢的:What a nice day, ladies and gents? Today I'd like to talk about……

中间靠后部分最好有表达主题的总结句,比如 Hence, I appeal to all of us to ……

结尾 thank u for ur time,礼貌得体。

3.通知

没有称呼,直接进入文章。注意通知发布者一般不是个人,所以不要开头 I'm Li Hua, president of SU.

第一人称处尽量用 we。

结尾署上通知单位和通知时间。通知时间要早于文中提起过的 deadline 时间。

三、书写

高考作文给分十分玄学的一大原因就是书写。在电子屏幕上,任何缺点都会成倍放大。字迹潦草的话那么 18/25 乃至 16/25 就是你的天花板。因为没有人在汗流浃背拼命赶工的情况下会对一份看起来不讨喜的文章产生任何一点同情。反之亦然,一手漂亮的衡水体赏心悦目,得分会至少比同水平的作文高出 2-3 分。

但毕竟不是人人都能练出衡水体,答主本人确实也不能(捂脸)。那么请记住,你的字可以不漂亮,但一定要工整,不影响阅读。不要连笔,不要花体,不要有涂改。如果卡这个标准,至少不会白白丢分。

![](data:image/svg+xml;utf8,)

屏摄自高中同学优秀作文。作者是上次评论区里的口嗨怪@之北之南,今天爷就是要挂你,还不给版权费。

如果能做到这样子已经很不错了。不是标准衡水体,但绝对工整,看起来赏心悦目不影响信息获取。

四、语法

语法这个问题太大了。时态语态主被动,主谓一致非谓动,宾前状后非限定,虚拟倒装逻辑性……这都是高压线。还有——句子不要罗列!很多人犯这个大忌!一个句号或叹号或问号内只能容忍一套主谓(and but 这种另说)!引爆一处,18 分以下,两处,15 不保。这时候,你玩不玩手法秀不秀操作,已经不重要了。因为没有人会再去看。

也就是我们老师说的,硬伤,致命伤。

这个问题其实没什么好说的。语法功夫在平时。考试时拿捏不定的骚操作不要玩,不要有赌徒心理。

高三时会有人发生高原反应——连最基本的语法项都产生动摇(其实说到底还是基础不扎实)。高三上半年期末,同桌陈某@(成绩一直很刚的 dl)英语滑铁卢,其中作文仅得十二分。

我看的第一眼:I'm Li Hua, who am interested in……(统一回复:am 的搭配主语只有 I,这里 who 代值 Li Hua,且 who am 不奇怪吗……)

我:……

他瞪着一双呆萌的眼睛,说,Li Hua 就是我,用 am 怎么了……

我一时竟无 fk 说。

他的字还很潦草。老师看了,说,你这作文要是落我手里,还想要 12?8 分都没有。

后来此君得一雅号:陈十二郎。

此次惨案有史为证,就是韩愈那篇著名的《祭十二郎文》。

五、篇幅

高考作文说是 100 词左右,实则大有讲究。

1.宏观上,正文部分要 3 段 11-12 行左右(包括因回车产生的空白),答题区剩余 1 行半是最好状态。剩多剩少,感观上给人以字数不达标之感——尽管阅卷人知道你字数合格(肉眼计数,很准,不要怀疑),整体感观不佳仅仅是个人写字过小或过大的结果,但还是会扣分。

每行 9-11 词(过多,字数会超,过少,会被判定为恶意凑字,后果很严重),词与词间 1-1.5 个字母的距离。开头要简洁有力,两行到三行,过多的话(四行及以上)阅卷人会敏锐地觉察到你的语言过于臃肿,简洁度太差,得分会很难看(这点很致命)。

2.微观上,7-8 句话解决战斗。3 短 4 长或 5 长。

短句做必要的信息推动、润滑(这点在讲流利度时会再次提到),完成无法秀操作的信息点,同时给读者阅读时喘息的机会(长短合理搭配效果惊人 阅卷人感受方面会再次提到)。短句用得得体、地道,优势不输于长句。

长句是传统意义上重武器,show time,各显神通的地方。句式方面再谈。

推荐 2+4+1 或 2+4+2 或 2+5+1 的布局。每个加数分别对应开头、中间或结尾的句数。

一套下来,字数将精准控制在 110-115 之间。

辅以工整的书写,给人的第一感觉会十分 nice。让阅卷人心动的第一步已经完成。

六、语体(重头戏开始了)

1.语气

语气要契合假定情景与身份。求助、自荐、演讲之类要适当 humble,投诉信要足够 tough,人家考砸司马脸,给他灌一碗看起来煞有介事言之有物的鸡汤。

建议信是重灾区。第二自由段的主体部分三句 you 打头(u should,u ought to,u r supposed to)是中国考生常规操作,殊不知看到这种格式阅卷老师乐成了花——不必再看了,18 以下。

首先,三个句子主语完全一致,看都不用细看就知道句式结构单一,手法必无太大亮点。更重要的是,这种建议实际上很 rude,甚至 offensive——是什么身份,才有资格告诉别人「你,应该做 A 做 B 做 C」?Peter 估计看了得当场断交。此之谓语气不合格。较好的替代表达下面就在下面。

2.得体

要设身处地地同情 Peter,即使敷衍,也要得体地敷衍。

建议信一种大环境是 Peter 遇到困难,很丧,那么回信的开端就理所应当是抚慰性质的语言。

大多数考生的抚慰看起来十分塑料。然而若是操作得当,便看起来十分得体,让阅卷人眼睛一亮。这就是老师说的在不犯错误的基础上骑脸输出,原地把阅卷人唬住。

下面举例:

Dear Peter,

I'm terribly sorry to know that you're having a tough time battling Internet addiction. In fact, such problems are actually pretty common among teenagers. Nevertheless, the situation is not definitely irreversible.

31 词,三行左右,一长两短,开头段就很漂亮地结束了。选词和句式先不论,单看得体性:terribly sorry 很地道,一个 terribly 把同情程度提升许多。宾语从句陈述客观题干情景(这也是需要涵盖的要点,否则按要点缺少降档处理)。后面给 teenagers 都扣上个大锅,宽慰效果大幅提升,Peter 也就不会觉得自己太 loser(记住他是你的朋友,你的目的是宽慰+建议+鼓励)。最后一句 Nevertheless 画风一转,告诉他,还有戏,只要按哥们我说的做。无缝契合下一段建议内容。

下一段是主体部分,长枪大炮齐鸣处。三句建议不要 you you you。委婉一些,Peter 正玻璃心着呢。

It would be a brilliant choice to……

You may as well……

It also helps if you….

Nothing can match ……when it comes to….. Thus , …….

Why not……? This will undoubtedly……

After thinking twice, I』d like to recommend…..(to serve as…..)

随机组合六选三,加以适当润滑就完事了。切记内容要言之有物,推荐某种活动,必须有相应的 ground 来支撑。否则,便是大忌,无论词藻何等华美,句法写的多么天花乱坠,不得打分超过 18。

前 80-90 词都这么有料了,最后一段 I wish 就草草收场,未免太过没有排面。想想办法,最后干他娘的一炮。

The whole process of transformation tastes bitter, but its fruit is sweet. I believe there's bound to be a bright future ahead awaiting you.

24 词漂亮收笔。这么一画大饼,Peter 估计都快感动枯了,岂不美汁儿汁儿。

婉拒也很棘手。现给出一例开头和分析。

Dear Peter,

I hate to say sorry, but the frustrating fact is that I can't attend your party, because XXX.(简述理由,一般下段展开)Thus, though reluctant, I can't but decline your kind invitation.

反复重申自己的不情愿和无奈。下一段再展开写婉拒原因。重点:选择的原因不可草率!不然让人感到被轻视!比如要去看电影,要去逛街,甚至要去另一个朋友的 birthday party——统统很不得体。找一些说服性强的理由,如远方亲戚突然来访,自己的数学奥赛决赛在即,母亲生病自己需要照顾等等。

结尾可再次 apologize,要是能提出补偿措施则更锦上添花(如建议来自己家里再来一次 party 一起弥补错失的快乐时光)。

嗯,此之谓得体。

七、句法。

现在进入高阶竞技。

句法问题太庞杂。我主要列举几种我常用的出彩句型。

1.前盖帽。

描述人物法宝。

Knowledgeable and enthusiastic, he』s definitely competent for this demanding post.

Highly competent and energetic, my mom earned her reputation due to her incredible dedication to math-teaching.

Always in high spirits, the new employee soon let everyone feel the warmth between strangers.

2.后打桩

替代非限的绝佳选择。

In the meanwhile, McDonald』s offers a place where we receive what we order more or less immediately, thus largely saving us from the trouble of shopping and cooking.

这是我大一英文课堂演讲的演讲稿节选。状语从句和伴随状语的搭配使意群在最浓缩的篇幅上涵盖了最大的信息,这种功夫是阅卷人想见到的。

The unexpected power failure affected most blocks in New York City, crippling people』s normal life to a great extent.

3.中间善用同位的。

同位语和插入语的使用使长句化整为零,避免了信息的臃肿,降低了意群体积,但又自然地插入了次要信息,同时让读者感受到作者对语言的掌控力和娴熟度

In 2018, Donald Trump, president of USA, signed a series of commercial sanctions towards several Chinese firms, which triggered a long-lasting trade war.

Driven by uncontrollable fury, William Wallace, together with other Scouts, started a rebellion against the tyrant, aiming to win the final liberation through violence.

4.高级非限

非限定性定语从句已经烂大街了,毕竟万物皆可 which 从。但介词+which 的搭配还是足以出众的。

Hence, we appeal to people from all walks to contribute their efforts, without which we can hardly manage the rescue program.

I'd like to recommend Chernobyl to everyone, through which we can see both the filthiness and brightness of humanity.

5.倒装句

倒装使用好了会使人眼前一亮。但不要多,一句就够。句句倒装那就是不说人话了(手动划去)

Right in the center of the city stands a monument built in memory of those who sacrificed their lives in WW2.

Young as he looks, he』s already embarked upon his second doctor』s degree.(谢耳朵本耳)

Under no circumstance should we define ourselves as losers, whenever and wherever we are.(应该是奥巴马的名言,但精确的原话找不到了)我觉得这句话好有力。答主本人曾多次引用。

6.虚拟语气

虚拟语气和倒装句都是语法大项,单独拎出来均可讲上一节课。这里仅为了功利化地套分而不做深挖。

Supposing I were given this golden chance, I would spare no efforts to strive for a splendid performance.

自荐信最后一段我最喜欢的表达,谦卑有礼,重申自己的希望。后面再 Looking foword to your early reply 即可完美收笔。

If you get immersed in an atmosphere where people merely speak English, your potential for oral English would undoubtedly be sparked to the largest scale.

As a matter of fact, you wouldn』t have suffered such a huge blow if fully prepared in advance.

这几句分别代表了自荐(求职)信,建议信与宽慰信这三种热门考点中虚拟语气的使用潜力。尤其第一种 supposing/suppose 或 providing/provided 引导的虚拟语气,熟练掌握者十中乏一。若能无误而自然地嵌入文章,对阅读效果的提升是相当震撼的。

7.表达观点的句子

I think 烂大街,I firmly hold the belief that 几年来也已经大大贬值。

From my perspective/From where I stand, none can damage the environment individually, nor can he purify it.

Personally, I believe that the trip was by no means a worthwhile one/I believe there's no reason to let this golden chance slip away/it would be an unadvisable choice to reject fast food simply due to unreasoned prejudice.

第二种我太喜欢了。副词打头本身就是一亮点,personally 的稀有属性又无疑是另一个加分项。在建议信(安利信、忽悠信)中用作结尾屡试不爽。

8.强调句

强调句最好长度较短否则容易给人尾大不掉,头重脚轻之感。但正如我所言,短句恰到好,威力不输长句。

From my perspective, it's the qualities we possess that define who we are, not our social status or wealth.

Every single bit of your efforts does count/make a difference.

八、词汇

一讲到高级词汇,很多人就恨不得把专八词硬塞进行文。如果没有,那至少也要是几个字典角落才会看到的长单词来凑数。事实上,这是对「高级词汇」这个定义的曲解。

词汇的第一要义是 accuracy。用的精准,贴切,恰到好处,那么这个词就是一个成功的词。反之,为了一个词生拉硬拽上一句话,甚至对整体行文布局产生动摇,都是遣词方面的大忌。

词汇的内容同样庞杂。答主能力有限,只能做到提出一些思路和示例,具体应用需在实战和积累中不断摸索。

下面分类举例。

1.形容词

marvellous, fabulous, magnificent……这种「大就完事了」的词在高中初期还是很吃得开的。嗯,至少在高一。

但经过一年多的历练,其普及性以大大增加。价值也随之降低。答主用来用去,最喜欢用的还是最早掌握的 incredible(原因之一是口语中常见,适应力强,地道)。后来干脆不在这种形容词上花时间挑选,统统 incredible 搞定。

形容词的最讨巧的无疑是复合词。两词组合往往能产生十分形象的描述效果。下面列举。

earth-shaking.

The past ten years have witnessed the earth-shaking changes taking place in my hometown.

这个句式可能有点烂大街了。但此处比 earthshaking 更完美的形容,我至今没有找到。

life-changing.

活动、事件描述凸显意义之重大。多大?能 change one's life。

poverty-stricken

吊打 poor, impoverished, underdeveloped. 准确而地道。

brightly-colored

亮色的。一次考试中很多同学这个概念不会表达。

breath-taking

高三后期描述景色专用。

life-long

忽悠信,安利信中经典的 life-long memories。

ever-lasting

永恒的。范围受限,使用不好会让人感觉很生硬,但恰当的话则无可替代。The everlasting beauty of Chinese calligraphy.

single-minded

专心致志。见词知意。

must-see

推荐旅游景点专用。

另一类是动词衍生词。往往不怎么生僻,但可以产生很生动的效果。

desirable

advisable

well-equipped

renowned

enlightened

devoted(a devoted friend)

unnoticed

名词衍生词

groundless

salt-free

最后是一些基本的替换。fundamental 替换 significant,immortal 替换 eternal。这些比较常见,不做展开。

2.名词

名词可操作性非常有限,因而准确、干练就足以完成使命。

item.简单,但潜力极大!吹爆!老师在讲解 2018 全国一卷专家团给出的满分作文时,前前后后花了 10 分钟花式赞美这个词多么见水准。

peak.形容某种状态的巅峰,人物描述常用,搭配 reach 食用。

angle.看事物的角度

desire.高三爱上了 a burning desire 这种说法。

target.名词动词均是采分点。

ground.证据,论据。这个意向在 ground 的权威语料库中十分常见,也是一种很地道的表达,但掌握者依旧寥寥无几。

3.动词

活用是动词的最高级形式。但注意不是所有非动词均被公认可动用。下面是较经典的例子。

shape/reshape

The life-changing experience indeed reshaped his character.

green/green

It』s our joint efforts that count in greening our environment.

top

Family union tops Chinese concerns, which largely distinguished our culture from others.

mother

Stop mothering him like a child!

land

Simply landing a job is already an unimaginable challenge for him, not to mention living a decent life.(其实这个例子的联系应该和「登陆」意向更密切些)

wolf

After days of starvation, he wolfed down the rotten bird without a second thought.

rocket

The tribute band soon rocketed to it』s fame after releasing another album.

trigger

In 2018, Donald Trump, president of USA, signed a series of commercial sanctions towards several Chinese firms, which triggered a long-lasting trade war.

voice

All I want is to voice my idea freely.

shield

The adult penguins gathered in a circle to shield their babies from the extreme cold.

storm

Furious and ashamed, he stormed out without leaving a word.

短语优先是另一大出彩点。列举一些非常吃香的组合如下

give rise to

give way to

cast/throw shadow upon

throw light on

be referred to as

long for

be expected to

make sense of

be overwhelmed with

come to terms with

agree with(Indian food doesn't agree with me)

pave the way for

come into being

put……into shade

pop up

roll the dice

well up

lit up

compensate for

kick off(开始)

wear off

flood onto

miss out on

be bound to

get tough with=crack down upon

be rooted in

be heavy with

fade away

cater for

have a deep insight into

下面一些答主本人非常喜欢的

foster

refresh

inherit

undergo

undertake

purify

overweigh

collaborate

uplift

fascinate

divert

distinguish

digest

soothe

thrill

combat

fulfill

exhaust

stir

stun

blossom

perceive

proceed

tackle

acknowledge(感谢)

sustain

maintain

soar

befriend

4.副词

词汇方面最高阶的战斗属于名词和副词。但名词可操作性实在太不亲民。(也不是没有,比如 18 年全国一卷 24 分作文那个 item,得高分我心服口服。)

那么就轮到了我最喜欢的副词。

副词文章中的作用可以归结为三个方面:逻辑,润滑,生动/准确。

(1)逻辑

表示因果:thus,hence,therefore,thereby,accordingly.

表示转折: nevertheless, notwithstanding, whereas,

等等等等。

句子中逻辑的使用使「言之有物」原则得到满足,文章主题内容显得充实饱满。句与句间逻辑的使用,使文章浑然一体,推进自然。

比如:

To satisfy your appetite for local cuisines, I'd like to recommend Beijing Roast Duck. As for places of interest, the Forbidden City……

打住,这边烤鸭话说了半截儿,怎么就飞紫禁城去了?要问烤鸭哪里好(bushi),忽悠的这么业余,peter 怎么能甘心掏钱?

To satisfy your appetite for local cuisines, I'd like to recommend Beijing Roast Duck, since it's/which is widely referred to as a must-have here. As for places of interest, the Forbidden City……

这一开口才像老传销头子。烤鸭吹完,再遛您内紫禁城去。

(2)润♂滑

逻辑副词是天然的润滑油。然而还有一种副词用法也可以担任这个职责——提至句首

大英课上的副教曾高度评价这种用法「地道」。答主认为,这种手法物美价廉性价比感人,不需要多么高的语言功底即可装得煞有介事。

Surprisingly, the highly expected French army surrendered without much resistence after the germans shifted their aim west.(1/1)

Clearly, the neighbor had no idea what he was going to trigger when he yelled out "Shut the window!"

(3)生动/准确

「其实抛开一切,到最后,它依旧是一个情感丰富的副词。」——王家卫

不知道有没有读者注意到,试卷中作文题的标准答案,第一段十有八九要用一个 totally?

I'm totally overwhelmed with……

We are totally unaware of ……

这个词可能是那篇标准 18 分样文里唯一的可取之处了。totally 地道且适用性极强,是少见的用不烂的词,答主推荐。

同样是 unaware,我们看看加上副词之后的不同效果

totally unaware

seemingly unaware

obviously unaware

somehow unaware

hardly unaware

可见,副词提高了用语的精确性。程度从轻到重,情感由喜至憎,副词均可以顺利完成。

配合形容词效果极佳,配合短语和句子依然。

我们看这个句子:

The number of people infected went up to 4000.

好像不太对吧?

The number of people infected went up to roughly 4000.

这就是精准性。

还有:

The country's bike industry went paralysed, due to the lack of financial support.

看起来不错。但可以更好:

The country's bike industry went paralysed, partly due to the lack of financial support.

partly, mainly, mostly 等等词化用在这种句子中,修饰了逻辑关系,准确之余甚至还有一点丝滑。

生动性比准确性更出彩。

相信有心的英语学习者一定注意过 freezing cold, boiling hot, icy cold, wide open 这种表达。这里的 freezing, boiling, icy, wide 形容词作副词,是副词界里的熊猫血,将抽象概念具象化,其生动性大大提高了文采,合理使用可以发挥惊人的效果。

即使用不上这几个,一些常规操作,如:

The yield of produce decreased sharply, which soon triggered a chain disaster in Indochina.

sharply 放在这个位置,活儿干得也很漂亮

下面列一些我本人非常喜欢的另一些副词。

thoroughly

definitely=undoubtedly

fully

incredibly

merely

slightly

largely

seemingly

whole-heartedly

faithfully

sharply

dramatically

indeed

simply

deeply

5。代词

代词有润滑的作用,同时也可避免重复使用固定表达,还可以修饰逻辑关系,以及降低意群体积,是应该被重视的小东西。

Spring Festival means a lot to us Chinese. On Spring Festival, we will paste couplets to show our heartfelt expects for good fortune and a prosperous new year.

对比使用代词替代后的效果:

Spring Festival means a lot to us Chinese. On this very day, we will paste couplets to show our heartfelt expects for good fortune and a prosperous new year.

这样就成功避免了就成功降低了 Spring Festival 这个词的使用密度。

The WW2 claimed countless lives in just a few years. The sacrificed lives indeed forced the whole world to reflect on the future of human beings.

再看看这样写:

The WW2 claimed countless lives in just a few years. This indeed forced the whole world to reflect on the future of human beings.

This 连接了前后两句,自然过渡,同时一个词发挥了三个词的作用,精炼,不臃肿,不重复。

九、饱满度

烤鸭的例子已经说明了何谓言之无物。高考作文的核心就是描写,无论是场景、计划、景色、经历、物品、人物、方法,都绝不能空洞。

比如推荐一本书,不应该说,这本书好啊,这本书真的好,这本书太好了,这本书辣是真的流批,你一定要看啊。

这是推荐?和三流尬吹公众号一个水准。

比如推荐一本书,他的作者,内容,故事人物,主要情节,文笔,口碑,后世影响,开创性特色,这么多可谈,随便八选三,也不至于白给。

十、层次与流利度

层次与流利,大部分已经在副词和代词板块渗透过了。

这里主要说一说一种可行的文章主题结构。

文章的第二段,一般也就是主体部分,为了达到言之有物的饱满度,大约要写三个要点左右。如果要点并列或略有递进,非常不建议使用 First, second, third 这种冰冷排列。句与句之间可取的润滑表达包括:

In the meanwhile/Meanwhile,

Plus,(这个存疑,不同地区对其认可度不尽相同)

Moreover,

What's more,

Afterward,

On the contrary,

As a consequence,

Furthermore,

Additionally/In addition to……,

Besides,

等等等等。当然,按需选取。

十一、修辞

山东阅卷标准是,只有在看到修辞的情况下,才会给出 24。

也就是说,修辞是写作中的金字塔顶。

但无奈其修辞可操太低。如果没有 22-23 分的水平,强行操作,几乎必翻车。

比如非要把月亮比作白玉盘,中文语境中是挺美,但英文硬翻 The moon looks like a white plate made of jade 就很 weird。

因为这不是英文世界里的思维方式。

答主在大考中也不敢横跳,只能规矩地使用老师批准过的几种「安全的」表达。

Chinese calligraphy is undoubtedly an eternal shining pearl in the treasure of traditional culture.

May the flower of our friendship blossom forever.

I was almost drowned in the sea of loneliness.

Never lose faith in yourself, because there's always a rainbow awaiting you after a storm.

再次重申,修辞适用人群极其有限,可操作性极低,不建议花费过多心思。

十二、阅卷人感受

书写、篇幅、长短句结合避免把读者憋死,已经在前文说过。

这里提最后一点:阅卷人也是中国人,在极其有限的阅卷时间内,他可能也摆脱不了中式英语的思维。

significant 我们要知道他的第二个意向是「明显「,防备完型阴招,但作文中不要这样用。

如果要表达这个意思,obvious, apparent, clear,随便挑选。

在作文中,significant 大概率是「重要」,阅卷人也难免思维固化。如果他把「重要」的意向带入你的句子中阅读,必然逻辑不通。在 6-7 秒的时间内,他不会多加思考。

让他不舒服,就是错。

找谁说理?

所以,大多数英语老师都会说,高考,要用常用词汇的常见含义。

十三、回复一些问题

1.我是学长。草(植物)。

2.啊啊啊啊啊啊啊评论和私信好多,萌新受宠若惊。但我最近实在回复不过来了,大家如果有问题,精练一点,私信解决,我会尽量回复。

3.文中所写英文句子大多没有注释,这是笔者的习惯,因为我学习英语习惯在英语环境中进行,所以也就没有翻译的习惯。我写作的过程不是汉译英,而是直接列出英文要点的提纲再进行展开,所以,即使让我翻译,也不免一股机翻味(捂脸。我翻译是真的不行。)

而且,我一直相信语言不是喂出来的。自己求助牛津朗文韦氏科林斯的过程是不可少的。我进入高中时买了一本缩印版的牛津高阶,三年之后已经被翻软了。只有不断地与这种权威语料互动,才能最大程度地丰富自己的知识储备,真正做到举一反三。

再说这也没有几个超纲词汇啊(……)

4.刷题:高考必刷题、五三、天利 38 套真题。但我不鼓励英语刷题。先把做过的题进行回顾工作量已经不小了,犯不上盲目追求数量。

5.有的学弟学妹想听完型和阅读。这个一言两语说不清楚,等我找机会会去专门的问题下回答。

6.有人和我要我高中素材,但基友已经先下手抢走拿去加拿大复习雅思了。我手头只有三篇大一上半年的作文,篇幅略长,词汇稍微超出高考范围,语言文风有些厚重,不太适合高考。如果大家觉得还不算没用,尽可以拿去。

Music and Me

Having been a faithful fan of the Beatles for nearly five years, sometimes I can still be amazed by how infectious their every single song can be. Yet when it comes to my favorites, Hey Jude would definitely be on the top of the list.

This song, originally written for Julia Lennon, was a gift from Paul McCartney. In the song Paul reminded Julia to always look at the bright side of life, despite the messy divorce his parents were going through. Because as he put it, we ought to pursue happiness with invincible perseverance, since dreams are achievable if we go for them. When released to the public in 1967, Hey Jude became an instant hit. Apparently, this magical song has successfully brought hope to not only Julia himself, but also universal people who lived under the tension of Cold War.

I first listened to it back in 2015 when I faced the same trouble as Julia. Nevertheless, the words from McCartney felt so comforting, which indeed inspired me to proceed. Additionally, it dawned on me that care from our beloved ones- friends, family, lover- is exactly the strongest shield we can have. And maybe just as the saying goes, when life hands us lemons, we make lemonade.

My Family

There are totally four members in my family. My mother works as a tutor while my father is an official in the government. And my brother, who's just six years old, is an adorable trouble maker.

Highly competent and energetic, my mom earned everyone's respect due to her incredible dedication to math-teaching. Apart from simply being a successful teacher at school, she's a brilliant guide for me as well, offering priceless advice whenever needed. The qualities I inherited from her- perseverance, diligence, tolerance, etc.- are exactly the most invaluable tools that I ever owned, which have really diverted the track of my life.

Contrary to my mother, my dad is far from a talkative person. Nevertheless, the old saying 'Actions speak louder than words', I think, is surely the best interpretation for his life.

The relationship between me and my parents is purely democratic. Unavoidably, there are times when conflicts occur, since such a thing as 'generation gap' does exist. But instead of quarreling meaninglessly, we tend to settle down our differences through face-to-face conversations. Thus, the warmth within beloved ones can always melt the ice built by misunderstanding.

Personally, I believe that home is a place where our souls belong. Together, we went through thick and thin, which overweighs anything else to me.

Are They Really Junks?

For so many years, we have been brainwashed with the idea that fast food, often symbolized by hamburgers or pizzas, is detrimental to our bodies. But have we ever given it a second thought--is this true?

I've been reflecting on this question for days. Finally, though reluctant to admit it myself, I'd still like to voice my viewpoint---- criticism as mentioned is far from being objective.

Hamburgers and pizzas have long been accused of containing too many calories, which, as opponents put it, can easily cause obesity. Nevertheless, this negative side is actually being over-exaggerated. As a matter of fact, excessive intake of any form of food poses a potential threat to our health, and apparently fast food is definitely not the only one to blame. Moreover, authority tests have already proven fast food " safe" as long as the raw materials are fresh, let alone the products we purchase at big chains.

As far as I'm concerned, despite the fierce attack from mainstream media, those so called " junk food" will remain popular in the predictable future when modern life becomes more and more fast-paced. Cleary, our time to gather around the family table has largely given way to struggling with endless assignments in the office. In the meanwhile, McDonald's offers a place where we receive what we order more or less immediately, saving us from the trouble of shopping and cooking. This convenience equips fast food with one matchless strength----it suits our lifestyle just fine. And personally, I believe that it would be unadvisable to reject it simply due to unreasoned prejudice.

----------------------------------------------分界线-----------------------------------------

看来天下学生党苦英语久矣。

最后唱一首黑猪,祝各位,尤其是高中的学弟学妹们,永远保持心底心底的一片光明(出处见水印)。

高考英语作文中可以用哪些特别地道的句子句式或单词而得到格外加分? - 迷途于重庆森林的回答 - 知乎